Why do you have to read the Act Like a Lady Think Like a Man book summary?
You really should read this book if you want to understand men, find out about your relationship status, and, of course, whether or not he is cheating on you.
However, since you are here, you likely don’t have the time to read a book, that’s okay—I’ve covered everything you need to know.
You will have a clear understanding of your relationship and his intentions for it by the end of the post.
Want to know how?
Let’s get started.
I have thoughtfully covered every chapter’s lesson.
This book is divided into 3 parts.
Part 1: THE MIND-SET OF A MAN
Chapter 1: What Drives Men Men are simple, according to the author, and there is no truer statement.
Once you accept it, you must understand a few fundamental truths: men are motivated by their identity, their work, and their income.
The writer claims Whether a man holds the title of CEO, CON, or both, everything he does is influenced by who he is, what he does, and the reward he receives as a result of his efforts (how much he makes).
The writer claims These three achievements are the fundamental building blocks of manhood and are what every man must do before feeling like he has completely attained his potential as a man.
According to the author, the man you’re dating engaged to, or married to won’t have time for you until he’s met his goals in those three areas.
Finding a committed partner with whom to have a family was the last thing on his mind.
Chapter 2: Our Love Isn’t Like Your Love
Nothing on earth, according to the author, can compare to the love of a woman since it is compassionate and kind, patient and nurturing, giving and lovely, and unconditional.
According to the author, she will hold you in her arms when you’re ill, laugh with you when you’re up, and encourage you when you’re at your lowest point and believe there isn’t any hope for you.
Yet a man’s love is different—a lot of it’s simpler, more straightforward, and possibly a little harder to find, according to the author.
A man who is in love with you is probably not going to call you every half hour to update you on how much more he loves you at 5:30 PM than he did at 5:00 PM; he’s also not going to stand around while you drink hot tea and nurse yourself back to health while he strokes your hair and wipes your brow with cold compresses.
How can you tell whether a man is in love with you?
He will carry out each of the three actions listed below.
the author claims If your man truly cares for you, he will tell everyone and everybody that you are his girl or wife.
According to the author, a man who loves you will simply bring the money home to make sure you and the kids have all you need.
The author says Anyone who offends you in any way, whether verbally, physically, mentally, or even in their thoughts, runs the chance of being destroyed by a guy who truly loves you.
If someone disrespects you, your man will ruin everything in his path to make sure they pay. This is just how he is.
Chapter 3: The Three Things Every Man Needs
Need 1: Your support
According to the author, even if he is not the king, man must feel as though someone is looking out for him. You have to realize that the world will be waiting to destroy him as he walks out the door.
He wants to be able to relax his guard when he returns to his home. All he wants to hear is you ask, “Honey, how was your day? We appreciate you making it possible for us.
Need 2: Your loyalty
According to the author, love is loyalty to a man. Your man wants you to be faithful to him as a sign of your love. This implies that you will always stand at his side. even if he isn’t getting paid, he knows you’re going to stay if he gets fired.
Need 3: The cookie
According to the author, No-brainer Men. need. s*x . Men enjoy it. There is nothing else like it in the world; there is nothing else that a man could ever need so desperately. Take his job and his house, but
Don’t wait too long to give the cookie, please.
According to the author, making love is how men engage in physical intimacy with the women they love, the women who are devoted to them and stand by them.
The writer claims Nonetheless, please keep in mind that males bond by having s*x.
Chapter 4: “We Need to Talk,” and Other Words That Make Men Run for Cover
We need to talk
The writer claims Few sentences are as terrifying for a guy as those four, especially when a woman is speaking and he is the one being addressed.
For men, those four words can only indicate one of two things: either he believes he done something wrong, or far worse, when he did it, and how he plans to make so that he is no longer in problem.
The author advises that a simple opening line, such as “Honey, see, nothing is really wrong—I simply want to tell somebody something,” is a decent way to start a conversation.
That’s a fantastic starting phrase because it enables the man to unwind, remove himself from the witness stand, put his tools of the trade away, and genuinely sit and listen to what you have to say.
Part 2: Why Men Do What They Do
Chapter 5: First Things First He wants to sleep with you
According to the author, men approach women with plans in mind. And the main objective is to sleep with you or learn what it takes to do so.
The author suggests This sentence should be highlighted so that you will always be reminded of it the next time a man approaches you. Always. And when it comes to women, that strategy is always to find two things: first, if you’d be willing to sleep with him, and second, if you were, how much it would cost to convince you to do so.
He’s talking to you to figure out precisely how much he needs to spend to obtain what he wants, which is to find out whether he might be able to sleep with you.
Chapter 6: Sports Fish vs. Keepers
How men distinguish between the marrying types and the playthings
The author claims that to keep this fish hooked, reel it in, and get it into the boat, a man must use all of his strength and mental faculties. Choosing whether to keep or return the fish is the next difficult step.
According to the author, a fish must be extremely special to make it onto its stringer to be kept. If not, it is thrown back into the sea so he can continue fishing.
According to the author, separating the two is fairly easy:
has no standards, requirements, self-respect, or ethics, and men can smell her coming from a mile away.
The standards/requirements begin the moment you open your mouth, so never give up easily. See, she is aware of her strength and uses it to her advantage. By her demeanor alone, she commands respect rather than demanding it.
Chapter 7: Mama’s Boys
The author claims he heard them all on the Steve Harvey Morning Show every day.
To the women in “Did I Marry a Man or a Boy?” and the other shows
In partnership with Mama’s boys, the author advises: quit making up reasons and accept that he is one because you let him be.
The author claims that women are at fault.
Let me explain why a man would get out of a warm bed with a lovely naked woman in it, put on his clothes, grab his keys, and drive across town to bake cakes near the middle of the night for his children, all by himself.
Because his mother set expectations and guidelines for him, whereas his woman did not.
I’ve already explained how this works: if you have expectations—standards you set to make the relationship function as you desire—a man who loves you will be the man you need him to be.
As long as he is aware of the rules and is confident that following them would keep the woman he loves happy, a real guy is glad and willing to follow them.
The only thing you need to do is set the ground rules, declare them out loud at the beginning of the relationship, and then watch to see that he abides by them.
Chapter 8: Why Men Cheat
Men lie because, as the author explains, “You can dress it up any way you want.” Men, plain and simple, do not regard s*x the same way that women do. For many of you, having sexual relations is an emotional, even loving, act.
That makes sense given the act’s basic physics; you have to lay back and permit a foreign object to enter your body. You’ve been trained your entire life to reserve such an intensely private moment for someone who truly means anything to you.
In contrast, neither feelings nor significance are necessarily involved when it comes to males and s*x. A man can easily have s*x, go home, wash it off with soap and water, and pretend that what he just did didn’t happen. For us, having s*x might be merely a physical act; love has nothing to do with it.
The biggest justification of all is that he can always find a woman who will cheat on him.
Nobody wants to confront that reality, especially women. Think about the situation if every woman said, “You’re married—I can’t do that with you.”
Man, how many relationships and marriages would still be going strong today? Many women are willing to offer themselves to a man who is not theirs, which makes it possible for males to commit cheat.
Part 3: THE PL AY BOOK: HOW TO WIN THE GAME
Chapter 9: Men Respect Standards— Get Some
Men are extremely straightforward, logical creatures, and if you tell us what you like and don’t like, we’ll do all in our power to live up to your expectations, especially if we’re interested in developing a relationship with you.
—explain your needs to a man without seeming like you are issuing a list of demands.
If he’s not that kind of guy, he’ll move on to the next woman—the one who has no demands and is game for everything.
However, if he is a man who shares your appreciation for the value of a strong family, he will continue to speak with you and pay attention to your ideals.
Instead of saying, “If you’re sleeping with other women while dating, I’m not the one!” “I’m always honest with the man I’m dating; if I feel like I want to see other people besides him, I let him know upfront so that he can decide if he wants to continue the relationship as is or ask me to date him exclusively,” you might say.
Chapter 10: The Five Questions Every Woman Should Ask Before She Gets in Too Deep
As stated by the writer: Being off the string is what you want to do.
Confronting a man and getting over your fear of losing him is the first step. Please, just give up your fear already.
The majority of People who are successful in this world understand that taking chances to obtain what they desire is far more fruitful than just staring about while being too afraid to try something.
The same logic can be used to dating: if putting your requirements on the table means risking him walking away, it’s a risk you must accept.
Question 1: What are your short-term goals?
If you’re planning to start a relationship with a man, you should be aware of his goals and how they relate to the three main characteristics of a man: his character, his occupation, and his income.
You have every right to be aware of his current activities and his plans for the next three to five years for him to become the fully realized adult that he desires to be.
His response will also assist you in deciding whether or not you choose to participate in that strategy. If he has no plan at all, you will know to raise your much-needed red flag.
Question 2: What are your long-term goals?
The author claimed: Believe me when I say that this: a man who has a clear idea of where he wants to be in 10 years has given serious thought to how he will get there and has looked into the future.
It indicates that he is planning out his future and has foresight.
Question 3: What are your views on relationships?
This is a multi-part question that assesses a man’s feelings regarding a range of relationships, including his relationship with God and his feelings towards his parents and children.
Many more details about him will become clear from each response, including whether or not he takes commitment seriously, the type of home he was raised in, his potential as a spouse and parent, and whether or not he is a follower of the Lord. And asking is the only way you’ll learn the answers to these queries.
It’s a terrific phone conversation, so do it before you kiss him, or perhaps before you decide to go on a date.
Question 4: What do you think about me?
He will need some time to get to know you, so you’ll have to ask him this one after a few dates. However, his response will be crucial since it will make clear what his intentions are for you.
You will have some knowledge about him if you have gone on a few dates and had extensive talk, but more importantly, you want to know what he is thinking about you. You’re entitled to information. Oh, believe me, you need to know what his initial thought was about you when he approached you.
Question 5: How do you feel about me?
This is not the same as what you “think” about me; “think” and “feel” are two very different concepts.
And after a month of dating, if a man still can’t tell you how he feels, it’s because he only wants something and doesn’t feel anything for you.
A man will seem puzzled and uneasy when you ask him how he feels about you. “I told you before—I think you’re…” he will start. Saying, “No, no, I want to know how you feel about me,” you immediately cut him off.
He might move around in his chair, scratch his head, light a cigar—anything to avoid responding to you or considering what he believes you want to say.
But you’ll have to get him to answer it.
His response that you’re searching for sounds like this: “You’re the kind of woman I’ve been looking for; whenever you come around, I just feel better—you’re the one I miss talking to when I don’t see you.” Stated differently, his response must leave you feeling utterly thrilled.
If you find out after you’ve questioned him and dug a little deeper that his affections for you are shallow and that he’s simply not there, then you should also stop being there.
Chapter 11: The Ninety-Day Rule Getting the respect, you deserve.
Therefore, why, ladies, are you giving advantages to men before they have shown themselves deserving if Ford and the government won’t give a man benefits until after he has been employed and proven himself? Come on, you are aware of the advantages.
I don’t mean to imply that you should cook for him, take him out to dinner, assist him in choosing an outfit, or show him around your mother. These are the kinds of things that happen in the early stages of a relationship when you take extra care of one another out of concern. In case you couldn’t guess, I mean benefits in terms of s*x.
Additionally, you’re seriously mistaken if you’re providing your benefits to a guy who has only been working for a few weeks or a few days.
This man is unknown to you—at least not much about him.
You are unknown to him.
He hasn’t demonstrated himself.
He might also quit his job at any moment.
And the only person you can blame will be yourself.
Consider this: where is the first person you slept with in less than ninety days? I’m going to venture that you’re most likely not dating him. There are indeed a small number of people who had s*x early in their relationship and are still together, but they are uncommon.
The likelihood is that a man who gains advantages early in a relationship—without having to work hard or prove himself—leaves and enters a committed partnership with a woman who subjects him to a testing process to learn more about him.
That woman undoubtedly set the expectations and the standards early on, telling her that he could either meet them or just go on.
You should be observing him for those ninety days: does he show up when he says he will arrive? Does he call when he will be late?
Does he show that he cares about your children and friends if you have any? Does he show happiness to be with you? Above all, is this a man you can truly envision yourself in a committed relationship with?
You can force him to wait, giving him the chance to win your love and affection.
Hold onto that strength. Hold onto it. You only cede that authority after the man has merited it, showing that he will honor it, and demonstrate action with it.
Chapter 12: If He’s Meeting the Kids After You Decide He’s “the One,” It’s Too Late
The author explains, saying that a guy must be able to see all that he will be accountable for upfront. If he perceives you as a mother, he will try to determine whether he views himself as a father right once.
This is important, ladies, because men understand that not all women are built to be mothers; that there isn’t a mothering gene that automatically activates for women simply because they are physically capable of carrying and giving birth to children.
Just as some women aren’t good drivers, mathematicians, or cooks, so too are some women not good mothers.
A man wants to make sure that the woman he could choose to have children with is at least capable of being stern, kind, creative, and compassionate.
The one thing we men do know is that marriage and family equal stress, so he wants to make sure you can handle things without unraveling—that you can handle the stress that comes with marriage and family with some degree of skill.
So, we’re looking to see if you can handle having to make dinner for the kids while helping one with the homework, tending to the other who has had the flu for a week, helping one get on the Internet, and kicking the other off the inappropriate sites on the Internet, all at the same time, without strangling anybody.
More importantly, you should introduce the kids to the man you’re dating so that you can see him as a father figure.
Chapter 13: Strong, Independent— and Lonely— Women
As stated by the writer: The following would happen in a world without women: Men wouldn’t wash or shave.
We couldn’t collaborate.
For us, the reason you are powerful is that you are a woman, and as such, men would stop at nothing to win your approval and gain the right to spend time with you.
You are the reason we get out of bed each morning. Because of women, men go out and obtain jobs and work hard to make money. It’s because of ladies that we drive expensive automobiles.
We attempt to seem all shiny and fresh for you by getting haircuts, wearing good clothes, and applying cologne. We take these actions because we gain more of you when we pick up our game.
To us, you are the ultimate reward.
Whatever the reason, the thing that makes you so incredibly beautiful to us and also happens to make us feel more like men is the special part of you that makes you a woman, and we men are no longer connecting with it.
A man can express his love for you in three different ways: by offering, by supplying, and by protecting. I’ve already covered these.
Therefore, we won’t feel the need to visit you in the future if you can support and defend yourself without a guy and have your own money, vehicle, home, Brinks alarm system, handgun, and guard dog, and you can practically shout from the rooftops about it.
If you already have everything you need, why on earth do you need us?
That is not what his DNA will permit. Translated: We value it when ladies treat us with respect and communicate your need for us.
We have a much greater need than we’ve let on to feel needed; to complete our destiny as men, we must feel needed by you.
We are confident in your strength to move the TV.
But you should let him do it; tell him that it’s a man’s job and that it’s too heavy for you.
Yes, you are correct; there is nothing wrong with your arm and you have no trouble opening the door to your car.
But for heaven’s sake, let the man open the car door for you and treat you like a lady when you’re going somewhere.
We understand that you are well-off enough to cover the cost of dinner.
But just stay there and allow him to collect the bill. When he goes on a date with a woman, it is what he should do.
In the long run, being a girl allows you to relax.
Chapter 14: How to Get the Ring
Your man is aware of your desire for The Ring—the pinnacle of commitment.
He is also aware of his need for you.
For one or more of the following reasons, your man hasn’t asked you to marry him:
(1) he is still married to someone else;
(2) you’re not the one he wants, or the truth is something you don’t want to hear; or
(3) you haven’t made him marry you or give him a date.
The author explains: Believe me when I say that guys always have a purpose. So what should you do if a man shows you a ring, moves in with you, or dates you for a long period but still won’t commit to a wedding date? He intends to confine you. He doesn’t want you to go to anyone else; he wants you all to himself.
Setting the wedding date is the final step left to obtain the marriage equation. You do the following because you know you desire it: Tell him, “I love you, you love me, and we’re in a fantastic relationship—one that I’ve always dreamed about.” Set some rules and expectations and enforce them. And at this point, I want to get married to you.
1945 is no longer relevant; you cannot cling to the past.
This idea that “He’ll ask me if he wants to marry me” needs to end. We will play with you until you give us your criteria and standards and stick to them, so we won’t ask you when you’re ready.
Now that you’ve put such a high value on yourself, a man will take notice when he hears this. When he notices that, he will wonder, “Is she worth all of that?” If the price of you is too much, he will move on. However, you don’t want that guy, do you?
All he wants to do is rent you. Renters don’t give a damn about the property they live in; they allow it to get damaged and neglected and don’t give a damn about how it looks.
After using the space, they reject the new lease and move on to the next rental when they find something better.
Chapter 15: Quick Answers to the Questions You’ve Always Wanted to Ask
What do men find s*xy?
Regardless of the imperfections you perceive in yourself, somewhere on God’s planet, you are genuinely “doing it” for someone – someone is drawn to you precisely as you are. A self-assured woman, regardless of the stereotype she fits into, is incredibly beautiful.
Will you date or marry a woman who smokes?
For the author, it shows a lack of knowledge and a weakness regarding their health.
Would a man date a dumb woman?
A wise man would never date a simpleton. But he can make use of a simpleton. Most intelligent men don’t want to date stupid women because, particularly if we’re considering proposing to her, we need to be sure that she can manage both our affairs and herself. She is unable to enter the office party dressed as the office dummy. Now, having a stupid, fine woman on the side doesn’t bother us, but we won’t hold onto her.
Should a woman buy a man gifts while they’re dating?
only in a committed partnership.
Apart from that, he’ll only believe that (a) you’re attempting to trick him and (b) you’re expecting anything in return.
Let him be the guy and spoil you; just wait and see what he brings to the table first. This is what true men like to do for the women in their lives.
Do men get bothered when you ask them about their past?
Yes, we feel uneasy about it. We believe you are attempting to delve deeply into our souls when you begin to poke fun at our past and perhaps even make judgments about it.
Just remember that you will never, ever get an honest response if you bring up the subject during your first date.
Asking about his past relationship is pointless since he will only be claiming that she was harmed, not anything he may have done to her. If you give your relationship some time, he will tell you everything you need to know.
Is it good to make your man jealous so he knows you can get another man if you want to?
That is not necessary; we have taken care of that.
It’s fairly obvious to us that our wife is free to go at any moment. But you’re going to be playing a risky game if you push it and try to make us envious.
Will men talk about their women to other men?
Not if she’s The One.
Thank you for your time.